The last month I have been feeling quite sad. It has all of a sudden sunk in that Liam will soon no longer be my only child. Although I am excited to have another baby, and for Liam to have a brother, I am also sad because I am so used to Liam and mommy, and not sharing my attention and love with another baby. For some people this might not make sense, and I can’t describe it any better than it sounding like I don’t want another one, which is wrong. There is a bond I have with Liam (that I think many women have with their first) that I am not ready to let go of. I feel as if I haven’t had enough time to spend with Liam, as my only child. I don’t think it would be any better if Liam was 3 or 4 simply because I’d be so use to that time that I wouldn’t even think about another baby, or Liam would have a hard time adjusted after many years of being alone. 

Anyways, I can’t imagine splitting my love between two kids, especially two boys. A bond between her mom and son is so strong, and having that bond with two just seems a lot. I know it’s possible and many moms of two or three have told me this is how they felt before baby number two. I guess I just need to wait until baby number 2 comes to see how it will all work out, but I have been miserable for the last month just thinking about this. 

I am hoping Liam won’t remember me not being able to give him my full attention, and I hope that him and his brother have a really good relationship growing up, because that’s what I am looking forward to. 

I’m not sure if my emotions are going wack because I am pregnant, but this change is going to be very tough on me.